Haunted Games & Rituals | Urban Legends Meet Supernatural Stakes

It's spooky season. The skeletons are out of the closet, the spider webs are hung, the jack o' lanterns are all lit up. But you're bored. You've watched all the scary movies, read all the scary stories. You're caught up on your favorite spooky podcasts. What do you do now? How do you keep the creepy vibes high? What if I said you could speak to something otherworldly? What if you could get something you all always wished for? How far would you go? What would you risk? It's just a game. Or is it?

Welcome to the nuts of things ghost podcast. My name is Greg. You just heard Andy in the intro talking about. I have no idea. I really don't know.

Haunted games.

Haunted games. Okay, cool. If it's your first time listening, I'm a hardline skeptic. Andy, how would you best describe yourself?

Oh, I am all in on the paranormal.

All right. Basically, the show works is I have no idea really what's going on. I don't know very much about the paranormal at all. And so far, what I've heard in our handful of episodes, I dislike most of it. So Andy here, the believer, explains it to me and then I react as one does who has common sense. So tell me about.

I wouldn't say that.

Tell me more about these haunted games.

So these are all games or rituals that have been passed around. Some you supposedly get some kind of reward, maybe. Okay, some maybe not so much.

Is this like some kind of trickster thing? You give up something and get something or you get.

Sometimes you're just risking. Who knows what is this like a.

Genie wish where you wish for something and then something bad happens to you in exchange?

We're only going to cover a couple. There's a whole bunch of them out there, ritual type things, you know, some of them you've probably heard of that we're not really going to talk about. But like, Bloody Mary would be an example.

Gotcha. Kind of an urban legend ish kind of thing.

Yeah, yeah. This is a little bit of an urban legend episode. Like Bloody Mary. You would stand in a dark room, you only have a candle, you know, Sometimes it makes you spin around. Sometimes you just go ahead and say Bloody Mary.

It basically makes you look an idiot.

In the dark a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. Sometimes you say Bloody Mary three times, sometimes 13 times. It depends on, I guess, where you're from, how it's passed down.

Right.

She's said to appear in the mirror afterwards.

So again, hard and fast with the rules. Here. Huh?

A little bit. A little bit, yeah. And another one maybe that you've heard of is light as a feather, stiff as a board. You've heard of that? One person lays in the floor, everyone else sits in a circle, they put a couple of fingers under them, you chant light as a feather, stiff as a board.

I had no idea what that was.

You haven't heard of that before?

No. I didn't understand there was a thing behind it. I thought it was more of a phrase.

Oh, no, it's an actual. I mean, it's like a sleepover game, but you sit in a circle around the person, you put two fingers under them, you chant the phrase, and never have I. Supposedly they lift up.

Never has. This. This is a sleepover game. From when?

I mean, from.

I've never. I've never.

Long, long into the 1900s, as far as I know. Maybe earlier.

I'm not from the 1900s.

I mean, you are from the 1900s.

That's a good point. But I. I mean, I was thinking.

I mean, it went way back. It's.

This is.

This is an old one that I thought most people had heard of.

No, I didn't know that was a real thing. I thought that. I thought it was just a phrase.

You just thought. People said light as a feather, stiff as a board randomly.

I hadn't. Yeah, I had no idea.

And what did you think it actually meant?

I have no idea.

Because it. Like it. That's literally what the game is.

I've never heard of a game associated with it.

It turns the person light as a feather, but they're laying stiff as a board.

Let me say something in my defense. I grew up as a normal human, so maybe that is part of.

Well, I mean, technically I've never played this, but.

I get it. But I mean, you already knew what it was beforehand. My brain is not scrambled by all this make believe stuff that we talk about in this podcast. So I think maybe that's why I didn't. I have no familiarity with this goofy game, but go ahead.

Well, at least you were, you know, 50% on the opener. You knew Bloody Mary. I knew that, but you didn't know. Ladies and feathers.

I've never played it. I've never played Bloody Mary.

Well, no. I mean, I've never actually sat in the bathroom and spun around and put my left foot in and my right foot.

Better things to do. Shake it all about. I don't have time for all that.

Also, I don't want Bloody Mary to come into my bathroom.

Well, not so much worried about that.

Well, you should be. Okay, so the first game we're going to talk about, it's called the Runner. Probably not one you're going to participate in now just by the title. Also running. I'm out.

Also didn't like running at all. Ever.

Yeah, entire life. So for this, you need a long, dark hallway with no windows. You need an object that you're willing to wager. So it can be anything. It can be, I guess, money. It could be your favorite T shirt.

It could be a lot of stakes.

Another person?

That's what I was going to ask. Can you take a person with you?

It could be a person.

Okay, go ahead, tell me.

I don't think that's recommended because you're putting this object.

I'm wagering a person on the line.

So if you want to. You're wagering a person. You're going double or nothing for this object. Oh, so if you lose the object, you're on forever. If you win, it doubles the object.

Wait a minute. So then I get two people?

Yeah. So if you were willing to risk this person, you could get two of that person.

Is this how cloning works?

It's a possibility.

All right, well, this is weird, but go ahead.

So you also need a sharp object so that you can.

So you can fall on it while you're running? No, it's like running with scissors.

You would probably discard it before the race, but you do need it to draw the start and finish lines in your blood. What?

Okay, is this another sleepover game?

If you have a long, dark hallway and plenty of blood to spare, I mean, if you. This is more of a one player game. I think other people could maybe.

Who plays this game? What kind of weird, bored person plays this game? And how many times has it worked?

Well, I don't know.

Oh, don't worry about that. All right, go ahead.

Probably. You're probably not telling if it did because then you got two people. And then that's probably illegal if I am, because one of those people is a duplicate.

And if I. Not if I run down this hallway holding, like myself, you know, and like that fake, like, you know when you turn your back and you kind of move your hands up, down, like you're making up making out with somebody. If I hold myself and I run myself down the hallway.

You're not holding the object. I'm getting ready to tell you what you do with the object. You don't hold the object that would hold you back. You got to be aerodynamic you probably want to shave all the air.

How fast do I have to go?

Faster than your opponent.

Who's my opponent?

Yes, something. Something that is conjured demon. You're able to win, though. It's a fair race.

Okay, that's cool. I can't see the person.

You could make it a little more fair. Also a little less fair because you could draw another line down the middle that separates you two. That would ensure that you didn't get interfered with. But that line also needs to be in your blood. So depending on how long this hallway is, you're losing a lot of blood.

To draw make it across.

So it's might not even have the starting line. The middle line is optional.

You just spilled all kinds of blood.

In this hallway that somebody's going to.

Find you just pass out.

And we're going to have a whole. We're going to have a true crime story instead of a paranormal game story.

Yeah.

So that's only optional. You probably don't want to do that one. So you need to leave enough room past the finish line because that's where you're going to stick your object. So if it's a person, they got to stand down there. You also would like to have room to cross the line.

I thought I was holding it while I was running.

No, no, no, no. You're putting the. The object is at the end. You're racing to the object.

Whoever gets there first.

Yeah. So you put the object there, then you draw the start line. And you got to have enough room so that you can stand before the start line.

Can I ask a question?

You gotta get in position.

So I'm drawing. I gotta draw the start and finish line of my blood. Do I have to write start and at the finish line? Do I have to write finish or do I have to put like a checker flag of my own blood?

I'm pretty sure that's optional. I also would not recommend that.

Seems like a lot of blood, is what I'm trying to say, because, you.

Know, you can probably draw just.

Just lines.

Two little lines in blood. They probably don't even have to be like complete lines.

I was wondering, do I need like a. Like a yardstick to make sure it's nice and straight so that way I'm not giving my opponent or myself advantage.

I would at least put it to your advantage and hope that they don't notice.

Okay.

I mean, I don't recommend cheating, especially against whatever.

Again, we don't know who this.

We don't even have any other it's not really defined, so.

Okay. It could be whatever you want it.

To be, and we're going to get to that. Oh, there is a little bit.

Oh, you could. You could pick your opponent kind of. Okay.

Kind of. Cool.

Who's the slowest? Who's the slowest ghost I can think about?

How fast is Casper?

Yeah. How fast is John Candy's ghost?

Oh, that's.

Can I do that?

Sort of.

Okay, I'll let you finish. Go ahead.

So you set up the finish line. You get to your start line. It's got to be night. All the lights got to be out, Right. You get in your starting position, you close your eyes, you clear your mind. Now you're thinking of your opponent, but not an exact person. You don't want to think of exactly who you're racing. Just kind of get an idea in your head of who you're racing, really. So you don't want to do John Candy, but, you know, unathletic person.

The most unathletic ghost I can like.

Yes.

Okay.

You want to make it as general as possible. If you're too exact, they might not show up. So if you're thinking John Candy in particular, then nobody's going to come.

Nobody's there.

You want to just think as vague as possible. But here's my opponent. Now, if nobody shows up, how do.

I know they showed up?

Complete silence. Oh, then you know that they've declined.

They can do that. I just spilled all my blood here, and they cannot show up.

Well, but you might have done something wrong. Like maybe they saw you tip the line in your favor. Maybe, you know, you visualized the wrong person. Whatever. They can decline it. Now, if this happens, do not proceed. You just clean up everything.

Clean up, mop up all your blood.

Yep. Head on out. You can try again. But not tonight. You try again another night.

Yeah.

Now, if you hear a voice next to you, then they've accepted.

Okay. All right. What do they say?

Could be anything.

Oh, okay.

Could just be whispers. You might not be able to really decipher it, but if you're hearing some kind of voices, either the race is accepted or you need to seek professional help. One of the two.

Yeah.

For instance, for this example, we're going to say, I think your race has been accepted.

I think that no matter what, you should seek some kind of. You just bled over this hallway. And then. And then put a baby on the other end or something. Or your cat. And then you're like, I'm gonna race a ghost.

I wouldn't recommend putting a cat because it might not stay there. Well, and then you race for nothing.

You put a $20 bill on the.

Other side, and then you're getting 40 bucks.

You bled over the hallway. And then you're trying to race a ghost that may or may not show up. You have a problem to begin with. Number one, it's just 20 bucks.

I would put something.

$40 Right now.

Yeah. I would put, like, a gold brick or something.

Who has that? And why is this person racing a ghost? They have a gold brick. You don't just have one gold brick. You usually have more than one.

Well, they put more than one down there.

All right. Okay. All right. Sure.

So if this happens, if you start.

Hearing voices, what does Vegas have to say about this? What are the. Like, I mean, is this regulated?

The. The summoning is getting probably three to one odds.

Oh, okay.

Because it's otherworldly, and you're probably going to mess it up. You're probably going to start thinking of John Candy, and then the race is going to be defunct or you're going to accidentally go, oh, I know how these other creatures work. They're all muscular and they're all built. So then you messed up, because how are you going to beat this guy?

You can't beat him.

If you picture a dogman, you're screwed.

Yeah. He's across the finish line for you even know it.

Yeah. Especially if you put, like, roadkill or something down there.

Some kibble.

Some kibble? Yeah. Like you're screwed. You got to picture the right thing. So Vegas is probably betting on what you're summoning.

Gotcha.

But face forward. Don't look at it. That's one of the important things. You never look at whatever you're summoning. Listen carefully, because when they ask, what are the stakes? Now you're getting an actual word.

I put it already. Put it down there.

Yes, but the stakes are. And you must say this exactly. Double or nothing.

What if I don't say that?

Then the race is off.

Who makes that call? What's the governing body?

The other world, apparently.

So technically, there is, like, more than one person there. There's somebody. There's like, an official.

I'm assuming there's probably some sort of official.

I'm assuming when I put the blood.

Down, it summons the official first.

It summons the official, and then if.

You do it wrong, then the official calls it off and doesn't summon the appeal, and then you lose.

Do you lose your stuff?

No, I think it's just. It's not accepted. So you can keep the one thing. We're fine. Because you never said double or nothing.

Okay.

Now, if you get to this point,.

Put the wager out there.

Once you say double or nothing, then the race is ready to begin.

Okay.

You cannot look at them. You get in your position, you say, on your mark, get set, go. Do not run before you say go. That would be a problem because now that's a fault. The race is official.

Why isn't the official handling the countdown? Why am I responsible for handling that?

Because you're putting everything on the line. It's all up to you. So you don't. You're the one that could cheat. So also, maybe it's. You could accidentally cheat yourself. Maybe you're counting wrong. So then you stumble on your market, say go, and you take off too early. So it's putting more pressure on you, I think.

Okay. All right.

So once you say go, you can run. If you lose, you're going to know automatically because your wager is just going to disappear. There's nothing there. No opponent, no nothing. Now, if you win, you're gonna see three things.

Oh.

You're gonna see your wager, you're gonna see it's duplicate and there will be a slip of paper.

So you're giving me like a receipt. You're telling me.

Well, on that slip of paper will be one word.

Yeah.

Again.

Oh, trying to. I've lost a lot of blood. I'm winded. So what if I say no to that? Can I say no to that?

It is recommended. You say no.

Oh, it is. Because they're going to cheat the next time.

Either way, what happens? It's time to go. You clean up. You never play this game again. Oh, like not even just now.

So this is kind of a one time.

It's a one and done.

So this is like put your life savings down.

Yeah. You don't want to put 20 bucks. You want to put.

This is like the kids college fund.

I mean, not us. We would not want to.

You go to the bank, you withdraw the money that you saved for your kids college fund, take it all out, put at the end. Right. You drain your 401k. You close that thing down, take it out.

Right, Right. A fancy car, something.

Oh, you put the car keys down.

Yeah.

You're putting everything in there.

I also know that there's a lot of trickery involved in this house.

Oh, so they'll just give you another set of keys.

So I would put the exact thing. I wouldn't Just put a kid set of keys and you just.

I couldn't put the title for the car down because they'll be like, oh, here's another title.

There's another piece of paper. I would be careful.

So. Okay, wait a second. So how do I fit a car in a hallway?

Well, probably a car is not what you're betting.

Okay.

All right. Unless it's. I mean, it could be a big hallway.

It could be.

Just can't wait.

Could be anything.

Yeah, yeah. But. Yeah, definitely. This is it. You clean up everything, you never play again.

Okay, but why is that?

Because no matter what, if you do this again, you're going to lose because.

They're going to cheat, right?

Yeah.

Is that what you're saying?

Yeah. It will not go in your favor after the.

Another. Another, like, I believe will hold you back.

Especially if you're not putting blood down the middle to hold them back.

Rubbing. Rubbing is racing, man.

Rubbing is racing. They can get away with it, but like I said, it's a lot of trickery involved in the spirit world. So, like, they're probably letting you win one.

Oh, right. They're. They're trying to.

They say it's. They say it's a. Pace yourself. You don't have to sprint to win.

They're trying to pull shark.

Yeah, they're trying to like. Yeah, they're hustling you.

Yeah.

And then that. That's.

Oh.

Again. Come on, let's do it again.

Yeah, come on, man.

Look how easily.

Don't let me leave like that.

You didn't even see me finish.

Give me another shot.

Maybe I'm still way back there.

Gotcha. Yeah.

So it's a lot of. A lot of tricker involved. So you don't want to do it again.

Gotcha.

And I imagine losing would involve more. Losing more than. Than just your weight.

You're gonna go again. It's probably like next time is.

Yeah, you're gone now.

Yeah.

And then somebody just finds your blood in the hallway and nobody knows. What is this? There's a weird. This line is not even straight.

Yeah, no, they try to cheat, obviously.

I don't like. I don't. I know what's going on here. It's the runner game. Obviously police are on to this. They would catch on immediately. They wouldn't even investigate your, like, dumb.

He went to the.

Do you know how many people just disappear and they don't care?

He's got his spirit sucked to hell because he decided to go again.

This is why. So you gonna be playing that one?

No. Because I don't think there's any rational person that would ever do this.

I mean, if you were fast, I don't know.

I'm not going to bleed all over a hallway to play a dumb game because I have common sense.

Okay. All right, well, we'll see how you feel about the next one then. All right, next game that we're going to talk about is called the Three Kings. Can you give me any kind of guess what you think this might be about? I didn't think so.

Okay.

You weren't going to be right anyway.

All right, cool.

So for this.

Thanks for setting me up.

You need a large, quiet room, preferably with no windows. If it has windows, why do cover it up?

Okay.

We need no outside exposure. We need no lights coming in.

Everybody hates windows. Yeah, the spirit realm hates windows.

Yep, they do. You need a candle. You need a small bucket of water, a clean cup, an electric fan.

Okay.

Two large mirrors.

Oh, my God.

An alarm clock. Three chairs, a fully charged cell phone.

This feels like. Are you. Is this like a recipe?

And you mix it all in a big pot. You also need. This is very important, someone you trust to follow the rules and take the game seriously. Oh, so not Greg.

Not me.

Absolutely not Greg. Anybody but Greg. A small object that holds sentimental or emotional value for you. So you begin at 11pm you place one chair facing north. This is the throne.

Okay.

You place the other two chairs on either side of the throne.

East and west.

Yes. Facing it. Facing the throne.

Oh, facing the throne.

Facing the throne. On either side.

Gotcha.

Those are for the queen and the fool. They should be about an arm length away. So the mirrors go on the queen and the full chairs. You should be able to sit on the throne and see your reflection in your peripheral vision. So it's going to be right next to you.

Got it.

Place the bucket in the cup just barely out of reach in front of the throne. Place the fan behind the throne and turn it on either low or medium. For some reason, it cannot be high, low or medium. Is it.

Can't have too much airflow?

No, no, no, no. You turn the lights out. You leave the room, leaving the door open. You go to your bedroom. You place your phone and your candle next to the bed. You probably want to charge your phone because it's got to be fully charged.

What? Okay.

You want to keep it fully charged. You set your alarm for 3:30am you keep your valuable with you. So whatever that item was, this is gonna, like, keep you centered. It's Just something that's special to you. So it's your anchor, basically.

Okay.

That's gonna come in later. So at 3:30, you wake up, you light the candle, grab your phone, your object, you got three minutes to get back to the other room. You close the door and your partner should remain outside the door. They need to be completely quiet. You keep your body between the candle and the fan because the candle's got to be lit the whole time.

Right. You can't have the fan blow the candle out.

Well, the fan's purpose, this is where the fan comes in. So you want to keep your body in between them because if at any point that you were to slump over, pass out or whatever, the fan would blow out the candle.

And so there's some kind of endurance.

Test and end the game. All right, well, it's for your protection.

Okay. All right.

Your partner needs to stay outside. They need to be quiet. Do not look directly into the mirrors at any time. And don't just stare into the flame. You're basically looking off into the darkness of the room. You only have three minutes to set this up. So you've got.

So 11.

You've got to 11o.

3.

No, no, 3:30 to 3:33.

Wait, what? I thought you said you had to set everything up at 11 o'. Clock.

You set it up at 11, then you go to sleep.

Oh. Then you.

Until 3:30, you set your alarm. That's why you need the alarm clock. I would assume your phone could double as the alarm clock. So you've got till 3:33, which allows you now until 4:34am to ask any questions that you want. You could hear voices answering, but do not look in the mirrors. They say that whatever is in there can pull your consciousness into their world if you look at them. So you don't want to look at whatever's going on.

You get trapped in the mirror. Basically.

Basically, sometimes it said that they could answer your question with a question. So they're being confusing.

Now.

One of these mirrors contains the queen. One contained the fool. So you don't know which one is which and you don't know who's going to be answering and you don't know who's answering, so you don't know whether you're getting correct answers.

Okay.

So you're taking a risk all around. Maybe there's a way to decipher that if you ask the right questions.

Can I ask a question of a fool that I know whose name is Andy?

I don't think you can. I'm going to continue with the story.

No.

What's the purpose of this? No, go ahead and ask a question.

What's the purpose?

To gather knowledge.

From what?

From the other world.

How modern is this? Because the idea of the phone fully charged. You were very specific about these things. This feels like an Internet thing.

It has circulated recently. These are all coming from Internet stories that have some connections to maybe other rituals.

Wait, so the race, the hallway race, was also an Internet one?

Oh, yeah.

Okay. I thought maybe it was something that already existed, although something the Victorian nerds did.

I mean, maybe they sound like something they would version of it too.

It's so complicated, though. Yeah, there's a lot more complicated than dribbling your blood around to make a start and finish lines. Like, this is a lot of stuff. And it seems like, how many idiots can we get to do this? That's what this seems like. Like, let's make a bunch of idiots do a bunch of steps. I mean, waste a lot of their time. I'm.

I'm not going to do this now. But I mean, you could see a group of kids sitting around. No.

And going, this is way too involved.

Let's do a dumb thing this.

Way too involved. This has a lot of steps, a lot of precise timing. A lot of kids doing this with access to a lot of mirrors. A lot. Like a lot of. There's a lot of things that you need in order to pull this off, and that's not going to happen.

I mean, it's two mirrors.

I get it. Three chairs, two mirrors.

It's not a lot to have access to.

It's a dark room with no windows,.

Or you cover the windows up.

This is. This is really a waste of people's time. And this is trying to see how many people are going to waste their time doing it. That's what this is about. This is like a social experiment.

I mean, if you really thought you needed knowledge from the other world.

Knowledge, any knowledge.

You can ask any question you want.

It's also the same as all this other stuff. Everything's so okay. You've got somebody that's going to give you knowledge and somebody's going to lie to you. And you have to figure out who's who because there's no way we can prove anything. Like.

And there's also the risk of your consciousness being pulled out. So you could just, I'm assuming, go into a coma here.

Right.

Which comes into play in a minute. Also, there's stakes.

There's a lot of steps to go through there's very precise timing. And then there's also. Well, even if you get all that right, you might not know anything else because you have to decipher what's true and what's not true. So basically you did a whole bunch of stuff for no reason.

Probably.

Yeah. So that's a great time waster for dumb people to do.

And I. If you don't trust the person outside, because you're just in here asking questions with no knowledge of how much time you've spent asking questions.

Right, because that person has to hold you back.

Trust that person. Because at 4:34 exactly, they need to holler your name and.

Or you'll be lost forever.

Well, maybe, but they need to holler at you. If you don't answer, they should. Well, first of all, if you do answer, if you hear them say, hey, it's 4:34, you need to blow the candle out in the game.

That is it.

That's your time limit. You got to get it over with. If you don't answer, then they need to bang on the door. They need to call your cell phone. They got to try and get you to answer, though.

They're entering the room.

They should not come in. Now if. If you don't answer the phone, last measure is to come into the room. Do not touch the person. Oh, don't. Do not touch them.

Okay.

Remember we had a bucket of water in a cup?

I splashed that in their face.

So you throw it in their face. Get them up, get them out.

Can I say something? I really thought we were going to go some weird Constantine angle. I thought we were going to, like, have to like, put them in the water and throw the fan in there.

Electrocuted.

Yeah. I didn't know if they needed to be.

The fan was to blow the candle, but I thought they were also.

Maybe they were also have to go to hell.

Well, you might if you.

Look, you have to die and go.

To hell, and then they bring you back. By electrocuting them. No, no, no.

They kill you with the electrocuting.

Oh, they kill you. Send you to hell.

Yeah.

And then you.

You got to pull them back.

How do you bring them back?

Who knows?

Do you? Then go ahead and look into the mirror.

Wait a second. It's all make believe, so who cares?

Well, I'm. I'm trying to get to your.

Yeah, you. You're.

So you electrocute them.

Yeah.

Send them to hell.

Yep.

Then you panic because you can't get them back. So then you hold the mirror, sit in the chair.

Yeah.

And you look at the one that you think is. That's going to have the full. The probably.

And I can manipulate him to go manipulate the liar and bring him back in through the mirror.

Okay. Okay.

All makes sense.

That's.

That's science.

Part of anything that I have written down.

I just made it up.

Well then that's probably not.

There'll be a lot more deaths from mine. That's.

They probably shouldn't. Don't use that part of the ritual.

Don't do that.

At any point if you feel yourself slipping into unconsciousness, don't. No. Then you focus completely on the item that you brought. That's where it comes in.

Okay, so now we're, now we're doing inception stuff.

So now you can bring yourself back if you start zoning out. If you got too high before you went to sleep, if you did too much lsd, if you did way too many drugs, set up a bunch of mirrors, went to bed, woke back up, did all this, then grab your object because you need to come back.

I got an idea. Don't do any of this because it's a waste of your time.

Don't do any of this because you could get pulled.

Yeah, exactly.

Into another realm. Mirror dimension. If you don't wake up at 3:30, just stay asleep.

Don't worry about it.

If you don't return to the room in three minutes. If you return to the room and the door is now closed or if you return to the room and the fan is off, do not proceed.

Abort.

Something has gone wrong. So you should grab everyone that's in the house.

Get them out.

Your trusted pal, your sleeping mother, your uncle from kaboikin. Grab em all, get em out.

Get them out. Something bad's gonna happen.

And do not under any circumstances come back before 6am so everybody has to.

You have to get everybody out and nobody come back.

And you probably want to make something else up and explain why they need to leave the house. Gas leak for you know, two or three hours or whatever.

Well, this is terrible. I like the first one better because it was at least. I don't know, this one is. This one is just like too many steps to be.

So what you're telling me is we're gearing up and getting deeper and deeper into the stories.

I'm saying we're.

But you're going the opposite way, liking the first one better. The better we get, the worse you like it.

This is not better. This is just complication. The deeper we get complication. For complication sake, add More steps doesn't make it better.

So you'd rather just run a foot race. And technically, if you run the foot race, you're doubling an item.

Let's make this.

Whereas in this one, you're just getting some questions.

I'm not going to do any of these things because I have a brain.

I'm just talking about reward wise.

I don't care about it because it's not real. There are no rewards.

Okay, but I am saying.

No, you're doing the typical magical thing. Andy. This magical world that Andy lives in. No, I'm saying technically, hypothetical.

If in some circumstances they were real by any means or whatever. The first one definitely is better to you because you double something. Whatever you put up, you're doubling it. This one, you're. You have an item. But.

But I have.

It's not at risk. And you have to decipher whether someone's telling you the truth. So even if you get answers to something, like, say you asked what the lottery numbers are going to be on the next draw, well, you might get two answers and you got to still pick which one's right.

Yeah. This is just a waste of people's time. This is made to waste people's time because people are stupid and gullible and so somebody wrote Internet nonsense and then they were literally. It's a practical joke. They're trying to see who's going to waste as much time as possible doing all this. These stupid steps.

Well, at least they didn't fool you.

All right, move on.

So the last one, we'll talk about the 11 Mile Road.

We're going to run down this road with our blood.

Or are we going to set up.

Some chairs on the road?

No, this one. You need a car.

We're gonna drive down it with her blood.

No specific car. No specific blood. Just you and your car. And a wish.

Oh, and a dream.

Or a dream.

And a song in your heart.

Or no.

Oh, no. Too far.

No songs, no songs. Radio has to be off. But you get your biggest wish if you complete the 11 mile road. So you start your journey, you turn off the radio, turn off your cell phone, you start visualizing your wish.

Magical thinking.

Yep. Just perceive it and then you hit the road. There's no actual road. It doesn't exist.

What,.

So you can't put GPS in and just drive to it. You just got to get out. Preferably at night, preferably a rural area.

But no road.

There's no specific road. There's no road in this world.

Oh, okay.

There is A road. You're driving on the road. You got to go out and drive. But you're visualizing this dream and visualizing the road. The road.

So despite what the road looks like that you're driving on, which could be a bunch of twists and turns in your head, you're visualizing a straight road.

Well, you're visualizing a destination road. Because when you get to the road, you'll know it.

Oh,.

It will appear to you, just mentally, you'll just know. Like, there could be some visual cues. You're just going to know, hey, this is when I need to turn. So you've done. You've done all this, this mantra to get there.

Is there some kind of spiritual gps?

Apparently.

Oh, okay.

Apparently, that's what you got to use. Like, you just. The atmosphere is going to change and you're going to go, that's it. I got to turn.

I got to go.

Now, some people say, like some people, there's a shimmering. Like the. The trees will glow a different way.

Tell me their names. I want to talk to these psychopaths.

I'm sure it's, you know, sebastian7@gmail. I don't know. Yeah, go ahead. Somebody you know. You'll just know. Don't worry about it. You'll just know.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

So you turn on the road surrounded by trees. Now, even if it wasn't when you turned on it, it is now fully wooded. Your first mile temperature's automatically gonna drop. So you can turn the heat on. That's fine.

Okay.

There's no radio, no phone, nothing like that. You can't have any outside interference, but you're free to turn the heat on. Mile two, it's gonna drop even more, so you gotta be prepared for it. Mile three, the road becomes a dirt road. So no matter what road you were.

On because you're off road, because you haven't been paying attention to the road that you were driving on.

No, you gotta stay. You gotta stay focused no matter what. You want to focus on the road,.

On the imaginary road.

It's not imaginary.

It's just not all imaginary.

It's just not here.

This whole thing's imaginary.

So as mile three continues, you're on the dirt road now. You're gonna start seeing some dark figures in the woods, some shadowy figures. Ignore them.

Oh, okay.

Don't pay any attention to that.

Hey, how's it going?

No, no, no, don't do that. It does not matter what they're doing.

It doesn't.

No, just keep driving.

What if they're like, focus on the road. Fantastic rendition of Hamilton or something. All that. And you're like, wait, I got to stop and see this.

Well, then you're doomed.

These dark figures got a lot of talent.

I'm.

Then I'm the definition. It's the definition of off Broadway.

It's definitely off Broadway. And I mean, maybe you turned on. You might have turned off a Broadway to get to the 11 mile road. We don't know. Could be anywhere. Preferably not like downtown where Broadway usually is. It's probably more rural.

Okay, right, right, right, right.

But it could be off Broadway. Yeah. We don't know. It could be anywhere. If you set your mind right, then these shadowy figures could be off of anywhere and doing anything to distract you. The more focused you are, probably the more they do. You think so maybe the more impressive. Pulling out instruments. Yeah, like shooting fireworks. Who knows? But don't worry about it. You don't need to know what they're doing. That's why there's little description, because nobody's focused on that. You're focused on the road. Mile four. Now you're going to start hearing whispers. Tune those out. Don't worry about those.

Okay.

Do not try to understand them. Do not try to answer them. Ignore them no matter what.

Don't try to understand them. You lose if you try to understand them.

You lose if you try to understand them. As long as you don't try.

Maybe if internally you're going to. The hell did that mean?

You've lost. But if you're driving along and you accidentally hear something, you might be okay. You're not trying to. But they got close enough and they whispered in your ear and they were like, look at this fancy show we're doing. Then you were like, oh, I heard that. But you didn't try to. So you're okay.

You heard it, you understood it, but you didn't try.

You were not focusing on.

Mentally engage with it.

Yeah. You didn't go, oh, what kind of show?

What kind of show do you need?

Now you're screwed now it's over.

Yeah, tell me more.

Now we're on mile five, where the trees disappear. Oh, now you're going to see a lake lit by a full moon.

That sounds nice.

Well, don't stop. Okay. As much as you would want to, do not stop. No matter how much you're drawn to the lake, do not stop. So mile six.

So it's mostly tempting me with shadow people, whispers and scenic outlooks.

This is one you should do because you Would not give one little care about any of this.

I like. I like a lake. I like a scenic view.

But you wouldn't. You would not be distracted by it. If you were on a mission. You wouldn't go, oh, I gotta stop at this. If I got.

I've got something I gotta do. Yeah, but I don't. It sounds like I don't have anything to do here.

You gotta miss.

I don't. Wishes aren't real.

Okay, so maybe the lake would harm you, but you would probably also be distracted and not stop because you go, that was not a full moon when I left. And so maybe you would go, something's not right about this.

Okay, that's great. But also, who's paying attention to that? I guarantee 90% of the people aren't gonna know what kind of moon we are. Oh, it's a waxing gibbous.

It's a full moon. I might not know.

I'm sorry, Waxing gibbon.

Yeah. I might not know which particular phase it's in, but I'm going to know if it's a full moon.

Are you?

Yeah. I pay attention to that stuff all the time.

How do you pay attention to it?

I'm always looking at the sky.

Of course you are, idiot. All right. Looking for UFOs and spacecraft.

I didn't say that.

That's what you meant.

I didn't say it.

Exactly what you meant.

Say it, though.

You didn't have to say it.

I didn't want to say it stopped. Mile six, the trees return.

Oh, the return of the trees.

Yes. And now the stars and the moon.

And this time it's personal.

Disappear. Oh, so they're gone. So now we're. We're flipping it. And your headlights will begin to flicker.

Huh. Okay, great.

The radio now turns on by itself.

What does it play?

A voice. And it's going to speak to you. What do you think about, like, top 50 Billboard charts? It might be W F E A R. Your worst fears. Because that's what it is. It's going to tell you all your worst fears.

It's just going to tell me them. It's not going to show them to me.

No, it's a voice on the radio.

Well, I mean, I get it, but I would like an audio visual element. Like, there's. There's the audio element.

Driving. You're gonna.

You can't. You can't get distracted. You are driving. But you could throw giant spiders at me down the road. That would be scary. Yes, but you tell me that I'm scared of spider. I already know that.

Well, he's going into detail.

Creepy spiders.

What if I came in and put the spider in your ear?

That's not that creepy. It just sounds dumb.

Well, he might have a creepier voice than me. We don't know If.

If I'm driving and there's spiders in my ears, I'm gonna have a problem. If I'm hearing somebody tell me about putting spiders, I'm gonna go, what is this idiot doing? I'm gonna turn the radio off.

Well, you can't. Oh, so don't even bother.

What if I hum a sweet song like Over Top?

Well, that would probably be for the best. You just need to stay focused on the road.

This road's taking too long. What's the next mile?

There's 11 miles. It's not gonna go quickly.

Let' I'm bored.

Well, it's full of twists and turns. It's not what is now?

Oh, that's the next mile.

No, that was the same mile. The same spooky radio guy. He's telling you twists and turns, and then mile seven. Now we've moved on to mile seven.

I get it.

The outside voices return.

Okay, blah, blah, blah.

But they're no longer whispering. They're now screams from the woods.

Whoop dee doo.

And they're getting closer.

Oh, my God.

All right, next mile, there might be a voice that seems like it's in your backseat. Don't turn around. I mean, you should never. Whenever you're driving, you should not actually turn around. So this is just regular good advice.

Gotcha.

Still do not want to stop too long.

Go.

Hey. Don't tell me to move on.

I'm telling you it's taking too long to get bored. Andy, let's move.

I don't know why you're bored. There's lots going on.

It's boring. Move on.

Next mile, mile eight. More dangerous curves.

Okay. Whoop de do. Great.

More shadowy figures.

Awesome.

We're just repeating. More voices repeating now. Now scratching on the outside of your car.

Not spooky. Move on mile nine.

Your headlights might go out for a few seconds.

Is this mile nine?

No, it's still mile eight.

Jesus. I don't care. I already had flickering headlights. I've already done all these things.

No, before. It flickered and they came right back on. Now they're going off for seconds.

It's great. This is what? This is going on for too long.

Mile nine.

Quit dragging out. Quit it. Quit trying to make it longer.

At mile nine, your car will stall okay, great.

Who's going to give me a jump?

Nobody. You close your eyes and keep trying to restart it until you flood your engine. No, don't. It's not going to flood your engine. You keep trying to restart it.

Is this a modern car?

It's any fuel injected.

It's not.

You can't flood it. You can drive any car you want.

To, but you can't flood a fuel injected car. A carbureted car, you'll flood.

But that's why I said you might flood it.

Oh.

Depends on what car you brought.

All right, all right, what else? Come on.

Do not open your eyes until it starts again. The shadowy figures will surround your car and they will do whatever they can to distract you. Just get the car running and go on.

All right, next mile.

Mile 10. Yeah, the voices will stop now, but do not look in your mirror. Okay, the creatures are still following. Mile 11. Your car loses power again, but it'll keep moving.

Oh,.

Can't do anything about it.

All right, cool. Great. I can see people running out of ideas as I go mile to mile. They're stacking up all these ideas and they're like, wait a second, I can't think of anything else. But now let's just repeat the same stuff over and over again.

There's a glowing red light ahead of you.

Oh, okay.

You can't control the car, so close your eyes again. Tune out the sounds. The extreme cold now turns to heat.

Oh, driving into the sun.

No. Some say part of this road is taking you through hell.

I'm at mile 11. That's your text. I'm at the end.

But you're not at the end yet. You're only partway through mile 11. Hell is only a mile long because it doesn't last that long. But it seems like an eternity.

Oh, okay. Yeah.

Great. Now the power is going to come back onto your car and the noises and the heat will stop so you can start driving again.

Fantastic.

You're fine. Soon you'll come to a dead end. Oh, stop the car. Close your eyes.

Yeah, you got a dead end.

And focus on the reason for your drive, your wish, your desire. Focus everything on it. Now open your eyes and you'll realize that you've returned to the beginning of the road.

You got to do it all over again.

Well, you can, but if you wish for something material, then you should check your trunk, your pockets, your backseat. And it should be there, whatever you wished for, to be there. Now, if it's not a material item, if it's World peace or something, Right? Then you gotta wait a little bit, like give it a couple days and then you'll see it materialize after you go home. Now, like you said, you could just drive the road again and try it all over again. I mean, maybe it was too easy for you. If you're a good driver, then maybe you can make it. But if you're one who gets spooked by the radio, then you could be.

You probably don't need to do it. All right, Andy, where can they reach us?

Well, you can easily reach us at TikTok, which is no such thing as ghosts. Instagram, no such thing as ghost Pod. And Facebook, no such thing as ghosts. You can hit up our website no such thing as Ghost show, where you can listen to all the episodes. You can click on the microphone and leave us, you know, your trip down 11 Mile Road. You can leave us how your race went against somebody, how much blood you left even. You could leave that story to us or you just tell us how Greg is a divvy downer.

Yeah. Or you could tell us how these stories are really stupid. And baby stuff, you could probably do that. Welcome to spooky season, everybody. Here's a bunch of goofy games with a lot of steps that don't make any sense and waste everybody's time.

And while you're at it, you can click on the merch and buy yourself a T shirt.

Oh, yeah, T shirt.

Or a hoodie. Or a hoodie. And you can send us an email at no such thing as ghostpodmail.com.

That's right. And then, yeah, we like to hear from you, talk about your stories, go.

On to Apple, Spotify, Wherever, give us 5 star reviews if you can and.

Tell your friends about us. That's it. See you guys next time. Sam,.